Saturday, January 29, 2011

The Baby Buffer

Sometimes a person has a certain way of doing things.

Like making the bed, washing the dishes, folding the laundry, etc.  And it can be mildly annoying when another person steps in and does things a different way. 

That is marriage.

I love it.  Every second of it.

But just for a moment take these things about your husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/life partner that you laugh off, learn to live with and eventually love. 

Have a baby. 

And then multiply those things by 587,360.

It is bound to happen when two intelligent (hopefully, somewhat), independent adults come together to face the most wonderful, difficult, stressful, joyful and confusing endeavor of raising a baby. 

You are going to have differing opinions on some things.  Expect it.  Embrace it.

Little things. Niggly little pissy details.  (With luck you've already come to stand on even ground about the big stuff).

Making bottles, dressing the baby, clipping finger nails, bathing and yada, yada, yada.

Do not fall into the trap of using the 'Passive Aggressive Baby Buffer'

I am a PABB repeat offender.  I am currently in recovery. 

The PABB allows one to voice complaints/nags/frustrations in a sing-song voice (while holding baby) and pretending that baby said it.


"Mommy always overfills the bottles...sheesh."

"Daddy makes the rice cereal too thick."

"Daddy never puts clothes back in the right spot."

"Mommy is an obsessive-compulsive cleaner.  She needs to relax."

You didn't say it.  The baby said it.

The nag is null and void.

This is a terrible practice to adopt because:

A.  It is highly annoying.

B.  It makes you want to strangle someone.  Namely your husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/life partner.

C.  You sound stupid.

D.  In reality the nag is multiplied by 1000.

So just take it from a recovering PABBer.  Just throw your shit out there.  Like you did before you had a baby. 

Hash it out and move on.

If you are a perfect couple and don't have any shit to throw out,

Congratulations, I guess.

1 comment:

  1. HA! that is soooooooooo true (both Kristen and I are guilty as charged) it