Dear Henry's Growth Spurt,
While I appreciate the fact that you are trying to make my little peanut big and strong; you are turning him into a man-child. Soon we will have to buy new pajamas because the 6 month ones will be too short and his little legs will be all bent up and constricted. I know you are just trying to honor our wishes of helping him become a professional athlete so he can support his dear, dear parents when we are old and feeble, but you are turning my sweet faced baby boy into a milk-craving beast-face. You are slowly sucking away my will to live as you make him wake up in the night to eat. I thought we were done with that evil. Soon you will make us refinance our home to afford all the formula that you are making Henry require. I just wish you could do your dirty work between the hours of 9 pm and 7 am. Is that too much to ask growth spurt? Please work with me here, not against me.
Emily (exhausted mother of the milk-craving beast-face)
As the mother of a 3 and half month milkaholic I am tired. I am so, so, so tired.
The size 2 nipple we have upgraded to is not the life-changer I hoped it would be. Mealtimes are still a frantic, arm-windmilling struggle.
I suppose they did turn what was a 20 minute circus into more of 15 minute fiasco.
I guess I'll take it.